fish!
fish!
2005-03-05
4:12 a.m.
If I had a kid, I'd like it, too, but Eminem needs to ease up on the songs to his daughter.

Hi, world...

I'm feeling quite a bit better, although my sleep schedule is obviously a bit fucked.

My mom has the weirdest solutions for things. If something goes wrong with my car, it's because I haven't checked the oil in the past week. You know, even if it's something like needing new wiper blades. I can hear her now. "Did you remember to check the oil? That's probably why the wiper blades went bad."

She also thinks that every malady I experience is the direct result of my not taking vitamins. No shit. "Alyssa, the reason you get kidney stones is because you're not taking your vitamins. The doctor told you to take them." "Alyssa, you wouldn't have a broken toe if you'd just take your vitamins every day like you're supposed to."

So, I'm taking my vitamins. We'll see if I suddenly morph into Superman.

So, I went to see "The Jacket" earlier this evening. It was an interesting movie. Apparently the cinematography was done by the same guy who did "Mullholland Drive" (which I think I need to see again now that I've read several theories behind its meaning...that's a movie you should probably see several times, if you're into weird shit). Anyway, I kind of liked it the first time, when it was called "The Butterfly Effect." And it was completely psychologically unfounded. We don't medicate people with Ativan who have retrograde amnesia. But we also don't usually use ECT on people unless they have extremely severe depression, or bipolar disorder, not epilepsy.

FYI: I don't think these are spoilers. The movie doesn't really have a twist or surprise or anything...this is all stuff that comes in fairly early on.

Nonetheless, Adrian Brody is a sex machine. Yeah, you heard me. Because I have a thing for skinny guys with big noses. It's why I was so into Gonzo as a kid.

Speaking of movies, who are the ad wizards that decided Paris Hilton could act? Was I the only person who saw the sex tape? I mean, the girl couldn't even pretend to enjoy the sex she was having with her boyfriend in her own home movie. My god, people. Get a clue. She's starring in the remake of "House of Wax." Because those Hollywood types have to remake any movie that was at all provocative 100 years ago.

I recognize that there are people in the world who enjoy miss Paris. I believe those people have all had lobotomies. Or that they should. Hi, I'm famous because my grandpa was rich. I should totally have a career. I have no figure, but people think I'm sexy. I wonder what things would be like if she were roughly 300 pounds? Would we still have to suffer through her presence everywhere?

You know what I love? Those late night infomercials for CD compilations. The other night, I was up until at least 6 a.m. trying to talk myself out of buying the Time Life Legends of Rock collection. There's nothing like eharing songs you grew up with, but had totally forgotten about. Two notes of "Don't Fear the Reaper," and I was jumping around the bedroom and singing to the cats.

Oh my goodness, almost forgot about this. My longtime readers (Both of you) may remember that I used to work in a gerontological research lab with a professor named Joe. I found out today that this professor is under serious investigation with the university. I knew that there was some shady stuff going on - when I left, we were counting data from people who hadn't consented to participating in the study (we had to have a signed consent form for each person...this means that each person we got info from had to sign a contract telling them what was going on, and possibile risks involved). Neglecting to do this is a major ethical violation. But more than that, I knew that he was pretty seriously sexually harassing a girl who worked there full time. When she told him that she was engaged, he became an ass and fired her later. Seriously.

Since I left, apparently lots of other things happened. He filed for 2 grants for the same study, pocketing the cash for one of them. He hosted a drinking night once a month so that everyone in the lab, (and, let's face it, naive undergrad girls) could get shit-faced. He paid for something like the first $300 in drinks at a local bar. Foul, people.

He told one of the grad students that she was going to be nothing more than a "trophy wife." So, three of his studies have been shut down. I think he's been moved around departments twice at the university already, because of his behavior. He's completely banned from coming in, and I think that he's not allowed to contact any of the lab people. When he sent in the only other guy who works there, as a sort of spy, this guy was turned in, too, and now he's banned as well. I wonder how this is all going to play out?

My buddy Niki is the one who told me about all of this. She's worked there since before I came. I think that's about 4 years, actually. I feel terrible for her, because one of the biggest reason she stuck around for so long was because she wanted a really good letter of recommendation from him for grad school. I'd say that right now, a letter from him would be a detriment. I'm just thrilled that I'm not involved with this anymore.

So, this Kelly Clarkson video, Since U Been Gone? Is it me, or does she need therapy? I mean, obviously her relationship with this guy was over long enough ago such that he has entered into a serious relationship with someone else AND moved in with her? So, I'm estimating at least 6 months have passed since their breakup. And she's still so pissed that she's tearing up his apartment? Get some help, sweetie. Nobody believes that you are "SO moving on" when you act a fool.

But I really, REALLY despise it when people replace words with letters and numbers. Remember Avril's Sk8er boi? That's fucking absurd. Who is going to even know that it's spelled that way when you sing it? You just look like you've had your corpus callosum severed. Wipe off the drool.

I was a bit bitchy tonight. Sometimes I get pissy when I feel unappreciated or unimportant or something. So, I have to publicly apologize, so...I'm sorry Casey. I love you muchly. And lookie. I updated and everything.

You really shouldn't ever shop when you're hungry. I know, everyone says that, but I'm here to preach the gospel, kids. I bought more frozen dinners than we have room in our fridge.

My former roommate, Gina, told me the other day that her dad has a brain tumor. They were going to do surgery on it right away, but he had some heart problems, so they had to reschedule. So, whatever religion you might be, please send out good vibes/thoughts/prayers, whatever. I know she's got to be worried about it, even though she's not the most emotional person I've met. I think it's harder for her than she will let on.

I'm such a dipshit. I spent $75 on a ticket to be in the pit at Green Day in Cleveland. Yes, I live in Lexington. Yes, I know that's 6 hours away. Yes, I'm okay with this. But, here's my conundrum: The stupid concert is the same weekend as graduation. So, assuming that I can stop being harassed by my profs, I will be participating in the program (aside: I am going to a psychologist/psychiatrist soon, so hopefully they'll be able to clue me in on what's going on, since I don't really know). I need to see when the concert is. Graduation is on Sunday. If the concert is Friday night, I could just drive seperately and leave early, although I don't really want to spend 6 hrs. alone in the car. We'll see. I may end up selling my ticket back.

I'm going to bed. I need to chomp on some cheese and crackers. That was a terrible segue.

Bella cerra. Fin.

My apologies and a farewell??? - 2005-10-20
It should be Friday somewhere. - 2005-10-03
It's Friday again! - 2005-10-01
Amendment to previous entry... - 2005-09-26
Longer than I intended. It's to tide you over for another week. - 2005-09-23