1. Headbands. Come on, people. It is no longer 1987, just in case you didn't realize. Headbands look really dorky. I'm not talking about those things people wear over their ears or whatever. Those are cute. I am referring to the plastic sort. Perhaps we are all longing for the days of our youth, but I don't think this is the way to express such nostalgia.
2.Extra baggy jeans. At what point in history did all males get together and decide to show off as much boxer shorts as possible. Let me give you a tip here fellas - if your ass ends before your pants begin, you need a belt or some different pants. Or a larger ass. You decide.
3. Camel toes. Seriously, do I need to say anything else here?
4. Pigtails. I know Britney wore them in some video or some such, but we are all older than 8. Let's try to look like it.
5. Shirts with cartoon characters on them. Unless we are in disney world, or if you are pregnant (which I will excuse because I realize that such a joyous occasion can throw someone into hormonal insanity) you need to get rid of the mickey mouse shirts. That is, unless, Mr. Disney is paying you to advertise for him. Then, you should so hook me up with that. I am broke. I'll wear dumb stuff for money.
6. Extremely bright colors. If you leave the house and you look like a "human skittle" (credit where credit is due - this was all Matt) please put on something sifferent. This applies to shirts as well as pants. Maybe this isn't the right time or place for you to show off your bright orange athletic pants. Or that brand new lime green shirt you just bought.
7. Really bizarre theme outfits. Okay, so some kid walked by me and looked exactly crocodile dundee, complete with stupid hat. Was it Steve Irwin day at Sears? Don't fall for it. The other kids aren't wearing it, and you don't look cool, you just look stupid.
8. Extra tight jeans. Ouch. That hurts me just thinking about this, so I won't really elaborate on this comment. Just remember you may want to procreate later in life. Let's keep sperm alive!
Now that that's out of my system, I can move on to discussing more relevant topics. I would like to share that Matt and I also saw some guy wearing a really short shirt over a really long one tucked in and I think he was humping a pair of crutches. Just a side note - all of these observations took place while I was doing some extremely scientific, unbiased research.
I'm in the middle of washing my sheets, because I think that something took place in my room while I was gone, although no one will elaborate. I'm a little miffed that someone else may have gotten to break in my bed before I did, but I understand. When ya get the urge, ya can't fight it. I'm all about the free love, but just let me know so I can be sure not to roll around in some juices or pubes or such. Also, I discovered that some really weird people were throwing objects from our quasi-deck. In a related story, one of my suitcases is missing.
That's all for now.
My apologies and a farewell??? - 2005-10-20
It should be Friday somewhere. - 2005-10-03
It's Friday again! - 2005-10-01
Amendment to previous entry... - 2005-09-26
Longer than I intended. It's to tide you over for another week. - 2005-09-23