First things first...Jimmy Fallon, I love you. Please marry me. Seriously. You can have girlfriends all you want - I don't care about that. Just come over once in a while and be painfully adorable and do the Roger Rabbit around block letters once in a while.
Okay, second, I had this horrific dream last night that I had bangs again. Now, I'm not by any means sassing those of you making a fashion statement of the bangular nature - it just took me far too long to grow them out. It's my worst nightmare to wake up to them once again.
Third. I think I'm dying. Okay, so I'm being a touch melodramatic. Perhaps I've got West Nile Virus. Regardless, I've been having a series of panic attacks and nausea. If one more thing in my life changes in the next week, I can guarantee that my head will explode.
Serenity now!
This next part is neither for the faint of heart, nor is it for those of you who have a Y chromosome, no matter how bent the arm may be.
*Spoiler space*
I'm bleeding. My uterus has literally fallen out. And because I'm so intelligent, I forgot to bring to work the necessities, so I'm forced to use those of the office. In other words, rather than wearing my familiar 'thin as paper, but don't wear it around a pool or standing water, lest it create a massive drout' pad with wings, I'm forced to endure the office's 'cardboard packaged, thick as a diaper, sticks to nothing but ME (ahem, ouch)' reject brand paddywhackers.
Note to self: Don't do that again. Also, have uterus surgically removed.
My apologies to my rabid fans for the sporadic updating as of late, but I still don't have internet service in my apartment. I'm working on it.
Also, today marks the 25th anniversary of the day Elvis died. It also marks what would've been my mother and father's 25th anniversary. If some washed up celebrity dies on the day I'm supposed to get married, I'll take it as an omen and fly to Bermuda to find myself a nice cabana boy.
My apologies and a farewell??? - 2005-10-20
It should be Friday somewhere. - 2005-10-03
It's Friday again! - 2005-10-01
Amendment to previous entry... - 2005-09-26
Longer than I intended. It's to tide you over for another week. - 2005-09-23