2002-10-10
11:29 a.m.
The fall of the Holy Roman Empire, or...the collapse of my bedframe. Discuss.

I feel like life's personal whoppee cushion these days. Apparently, I've been out slaughtering bunnies in my sleep or something, as Karma has dictated that this week shall be the week where all of the men in my life who are or were negative should come harass me. Dad's visit was just the first in a string of frustrating encounters with the male species. Eric, the former flame from hell, has recently been writing to ask when I plan to return to the fort. It wasn't enough that he should point out just how insecure I can be at times, he also needed to tell me that I'm single because "I'm not girlfriend material." My head hurts. Then, THEN, yesterday I got an email from an ex I was hoping to NEVER hear from again. Aside from experiencing things in that relationship that no person should ever have to deal with, once I decided to break it off with him, he broke into my house to try to change my mind. I hadn't even spoken with him since high school graduation, and he apparently got my email address from some high school reunion website that Gina signed me up for. Thanks, Gina. Hope I can return the favor someday.

I slept on the floor the other night. I should've known it was a bad idea to accept the gift of a bedframe that had its glory days in the mid-70s. This thing is OLD. Well, Tuesday night was apparently a choice evening for it to completely fall apart. I spent a good hour kicking it and screaming, whipping out my tool box to try to remedy the situation. I'm sure that the sight of a squatty blonde girl trying to wield a hammer at a piece of metal while trying to hold a mattress and box springs at bay was thoroughly amusing. Once I finally thought I had reconstructed my geriatric wonder of a bedframe, I reassembled the entire bed, only to sit down on it and have it all collapse on me once again. I gave up around 2:30 in the morning and slept on the floor, crying not only at my pathetic lack of strength and my complete inability to handle a very small reassembly task, but my incompetance at adulthood in general.

I'm sure my neighbors love me.

I called my mom yesterday to bitch about it, and she has graciously offered the frame from the spare bedroom. The best part? The frame comes with a headboard.

Um...not that I would use it for any reason in particular, but...

Where was I going with this?

I'm in love with a girl who works at Starbucks. She was wearing a nametag today that said, "Fear the oppossum."

You know what I'm tired of? Men complaining about always being "the nice guy." No, I have NO idea what it's like to be the person that your friends of the opposite sex turn to for romantic queries. PLEASE describe it to me.

*Insert sarcasm here.*

If I were the vapid, party-girl type you see out at a club, would I at least HAVE a social life? Probably. Let me pull my black party pants out of the closet and dust them off...

Unfortunately, "keepin' it real," comes with its own set of burdens. Sure people enjoy your company because you are honest and funny, but are people ever actually attracted to that? Nope.

I have a test today in Human Sexuality (aka non-sex class). If the sample questions the professor offered in class are any indication of what the test is actually going to be, not only will we all ace it, but if you don't know the answers to these questions, you shouldn't be HAVING sex. Don't multiply those genes.

My apologies and a farewell??? - 2005-10-20
It should be Friday somewhere. - 2005-10-03
It's Friday again! - 2005-10-01
Amendment to previous entry... - 2005-09-26
Longer than I intended. It's to tide you over for another week. - 2005-09-23