Also, as a non-sequitor, I have been masturbating so furiously (I'm convinced I'm gonna win something) that I think I may have given myself an aneurism.
Also, on this note, my birthday is in precisely 11 days, and if I don't get some ass, my vagina will start suctioning things. Keep me away from all pets, small appliances, coffee tables, and ottomans.
Where was I?
Ah yes, the survey. Forgive me, I am bored.
1. LIVING ARRANGEMENT: I live alone, surrounded by dustballs, ants, and my many spider friends.
2. WHAT BOOK(S) ARE YOU READING NOW: "Openly Christian, Openly Gay." And for the life of me, I can't remember the name of the author, but let me tell you people, I was crying 3 pages into the damn book. It's good. I mean GOOD.
3. FAVORITE MAGAZINE: Rolling Stone. It used to be Cosmo, but you can only read so many articles about the appropriate way to stroke a man's penis before it starts to get a little stale. I'm just saying.
4. FAVORITE SMELLS: Cinnabon. Enough said.
5. FAVORITE SOUNDS: The opneing music to Trading Spaces, or to Comedy Central presents. That, and the sound of an orgasm. Not that I have that on the brain or anything.
6. WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD: Um, hangovers?
7. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP? Where am I? Where are my pants?
8. YOU ANSWER THE PHONE: Half the time, I forget where I am, and say something like, "Independent Study, how may I help you?"
9. FUTURE CHILD'S NAME: When Matthew and I procreate (the old fashioned way, with a turkey baster), our children will be Ethan Chase and Hunter. Hunter does't have a middle name. We're attempting to make them as gay as possible.
10. WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN LIFE: Family, and knowing yourself.
11. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA: Depends on the mood of my uterus.
12. DO YOU DRIVE FAST: Negative. I drive like I'm in a race to get there the slowest.
13. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? Yes, Pimp Doggy Q. Don't ask.
14. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR: 1987 Honda Civic. Line of Jealousy forms to the left.
15. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE?: Negative, ghostrider.
16. YOUR ZODIAC SIGN: Cancer. Which means that I blame my over-sensitivity on the date I was born. Nyah.
17. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI? Why is this question in every sinlge survey? It's so lame. But yes, I guess so.
18. WHAT IS/ARE YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER(s): 3, 7, 21, and 69.
19. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH: Baseball and basketball. Mainly cause they're the only sports I fully understand.
20. SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU: I miss my darling Randy. Without her around, I'm the crazy one, and we can't have that, can we? :)
21. WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED? 2x4s from the unfortunate wood-measuring incident.
22. PAPER TOWELS - OVER OR UNDER: What the fuck??!!
23. DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD: In a sense. Probably not the way most people do, though.
24. 2%, 1%, WHOLE, NONFAT, SKIM MILK: Skim. The rest of it all tastes like cream to me.
25. RED OR WHITE SAUCE ON PASTA: Red, for the most part, unless the illegitamate child living in my stomach, Habib, is craving alfredo. It happens sometimes.
26. DO YOU WEAR YOUR SEATBELT EVERY TIME YOU ARE IN THE CAR: I have no choice. My super cool awesome tupperware car has automatic seatbelts.
27. ARE YOU A PILLAR OF COMMUNICATION: I am a pillar of salt. Because sometimes, I'm an Old Testament parable.
28. WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS FOR TONIGHT: Furiously maturbating, of course! Actually, I suppose that my plans are centered around whether or not Casey is conscious this evening.
29. EVER BEEN TO A CONCERT? What a weird question! I'm going to tell you about my first one, though. It was Sandy Patty. She makes Christian music. I hate my parents sometimes.
30. HOW MUCH JEWELRY DO YOU WEAR? Four rings, a watch, my Brian Kinney bracelet, a necklace, and six earrings. Wow, I bling, bling with it.
31. WAS THIS FUN TO READ AND FILL OUT? Um, it was more fun than clipping my toenails.
32. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SANTA CLAUS? No, not since I caught my parents sneaking around when I was asleep.
*Note - some question were removed because I didn't feel like answering them. La.
Fin.
My apologies and a farewell??? - 2005-10-20
It should be Friday somewhere. - 2005-10-03
It's Friday again! - 2005-10-01
Amendment to previous entry... - 2005-09-26
Longer than I intended. It's to tide you over for another week. - 2005-09-23